Assertiveness helps you succeed at work.
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Many of the top career challenges people face can be solved through the right type of communication: getting a promotion, changing jobs, holding employees accountable, managing own professional brand, being heard and seen, being taken seriously by team members, and retaining good employees.
The challenge is that people often feel like communicating what they want will come across as rude, unreasonable, or aggressive. So, they don’t speak up, and problems snowball into bigger frustration.
But what if you could communicate what you want to say at work without being perceived as unreasonable, aggressive, offensive, or rude? What could that do for your career? A lot! That’s what these workplace situations show.
Get motivated to be more assertive listening to the Speak Your Mind Unapologetically Podcast here.
Here are 10 real-life examples of what assertive communication can do for your career.
1. Invisible and stuck -> Fast-track promotion
Before Assertiveness
A young ambitious female lawyer in a male-dominated field worked hard, did a great job, and believed that her great work would speak for itself.
But she was feeling invisible and unappreciated. Despite her excellent credentials and long hours, she was stuck while other less qualified lawyers were quickly being promoted.
After Assertiveness
She learned that she needed to own her own personal marketing and show her contributions in a very direct way to her superiors and implement self-promotion strategies.
After starting to communicate her work contributions assertively, she finally got unstuck, got noticed amongst all the men, and moved up all the way to partner in record time in her firm. She realized that the only way her superiors could see her talent was by intentionally showing it to them.
Later, when she became partner, she didn’t know what the young lawyers were doing unless they explicitly talked about it with her.
2. Applied for a role and didn’t get it -> New role created
Before Assertiveness
A professional was finalist for a position at a new company he really wanted to work for in his dream city but failed to get it. He received an email saying that he was not getting the job.
He was devastated for a moment, but soon decided to try something else.
After Assertiveness
Instead of accepting defeat, he drove to the other city and met with hiring manager in person. With the information he had learned during the interview process, he pitched a new role to provide them the unique opportunities he had to offer. He asserted his value once again.
A few days later he got a call from the hiring manager, and he was hired for a new role that was tailored for his qualities! He has been working in his dream company and dream city for several years now.
3. Losing good employees -> Happy retained employees
Before Assertiveness
Manager was losing good employees due to overworking them because she was not able to say no to excess workload that came to the team.
To worsen the situation, as employees resigned, the current ones had an even greater workload and stress. And because external recruitment was frozen, she could only recruit internally within the company.
But the word had spread that there was no work-life balance and limited growth opportunities in her team, so no good people wanted to apply for the available positions.
After Assertiveness
She realized that part of her job was to assert boundaries on behalf of her team and focus on core high value work rather than accepting anything that came her way.
After learning to set boundaries with superiors, she was quickly able to reduce team workload, improve the team’s culture, gain a positive reputation again, retain employees, and get higher quality work that elevated the team.
4. No promotion in 6 years despite hard-working, highly qualified, and indispensable -> Promoted to desired role on the spot
Before Assertiveness
A manager had worked diligently for 6 years to build a team from scratch to design essential systems for her department. She was the only person in the entire company with full knowledge of how this system worked.
Yet, she felt very unappreciated with no pay increase or even mention of a possible promotion during those 6 loyal years. What’s worse is that she was working so hard that she started to feel like she wasn’t spending enough time supporting her children’s education. On top of that, she wanted a change in roles.
After Assertiveness
After realizing that she had to ask for what she wanted, she took the leap and scheduled a meeting with her manager to ask for a promotion and change in roles.
She was shocked when during that meeting, her manager promised her a promotion and change in roles on the spot!
Within just a few weeks, she finally got her highly deserved promotion, a change to a new exciting role, and was able to have more time to help her kids with their homework. She learned that her superiors highly valued her but weren’t going to give her a promotion unless she asked for it.
Gain courage to be more assertive with the Speak Your Mind Unapologetically Podcast here.
5. Leader seen as aggressive -> Leader kept edge and effectiveness while being more liked
Before Assertiveness
A senior leader was great at getting the job done but was being seen as “aggressive” which could hurt her likability and ability to move up in her career.
She didn’t want to lose her edge and wanted to continue to be positively demanding and effective with her team and coworkers.
After Assertiveness
She knew she had to better manage her professional brand and find out how to connect with her team and coworkers while still challenging and pushing them to get things done.
After learning assertiveness, she was able to adjust her communication to be seen as a caring, thoughtful leader who still pushed and got results.
6. Lack of confidence to participate in larger meetings with superiors -> Confidently speaking in any meeting
Before Assertiveness
An analyst didn’t feel comfortable speaking in larger meetings or in meetings with superiors, which was almost always. He was constantly overthinking in those meetings. And had 2 meetings happening at once: the meeting he was in and the incessant self-doubt chatter in his head.
Because he was silent in these meetings, he felt constantly bored and had a hard time focusing on what was being discussed. He lost engagement and interest. And because he was silent, bored, and disinterested, his management thought he was not suited to move up or take on more responsibilities.
After Assertiveness
After learning how to assert his ideas and contribution in a highly respectful way in these larger meetings with superiors, he finally started to feel more confident speaking up, being himself, and contributing his ideas. And his superiors started to notice and give him new and bigger responsibilities. He is on his way to a faster promotion.
7. Seen as rude when direct -> Seen as helpful when direct
Before Assertiveness
A manager was perceived as being rude and aggressive when she tried to be direct when giving feedback and instructions to team members. That caused employees to raise their defenses and not listen to what she had to say, reducing their effectiveness and growth.
She needed to be clear, but she didn’t know how to not come across in the wrong way.
After Assertiveness
After learning assertive communication, she realized why people misunderstood her directness with rudeness.
With assertiveness, she was finally able to communicate clearly, warmly, and cultivate positive relationships with her team. Her team finally understood that her directness was her way of being helpful. That led to higher team morale, greater productivity, and more joyful work for all.
8. Employees were not taking manager seriously -> Authority as manager respected
Before Assertiveness
A young manager felt disrespected by her employees who constantly challenged her authority. Many of them were publicly insubordinate refusing to do what their manager asked for, which caused team morale to deteriorate. Other employees had tantrums in front of all others in the team.
It was ugly, and this manager who was younger than all of her employees tried everything to be as empathetic, kind, and caring as possible with the team. She met with all of them to listen to what they didn’t like, to understand what they wanted, and made promises to change things. Yet, the insubordination and disrespect to her authority just got worse. She didn’t know what to do.
After Assertiveness
Luckily, she learned how to communicate assertively, and discovered that sometimes she had to say what needed to be said in a respectful and considerate way.
Within only a few months, she won her team’s respect. Her team became more productive, had more positivity, relationships improved, and she even got admiration notes from employees who said they saw her as a role-model.
9. Stuck in uninspiring business function -> Change to new business function despite no prior experience
Before Assertiveness
A professional was working in a business function that she didn’t like. The business function she wanted to move into was exciting and fun, but she didn’t have any significant experience in it.
She had done a short internship in her ideal business function area but didn’t think it was reasonable to ask for a change. She was also afraid that her manager would find out.
After Assertiveness
After discovering how to communicate assertively, she realized there was a better way to ask for a position in the new business function without getting retaliation from her existing boss.
She overcame the fear of asking for a complete change in role even without any formal qualification, and to her surprise was accepted. She left her prior role in good terms with her boss and shifted her career 180 degrees towards a completely new direction that she wanted.
10. Stuck as individual contributor -> Got first people manager role
Before Assertiveness
An individual contributor was highly motivated to become a people manager. But she had no prior experience managing people and felt like management could only see her as an analyst even though she got recognized for her individual work.
Her superiors said that she had to be patient and continue to focus on developing her individual skillset before earning the right to be promoted to manager. But she didn’t want to wait because she wanted the leadership experience.
After Assertiveness
After she got really fed up with what felt like a dead end, she finally decided to apply for manager roles outside of her company.
She was continuously offered other individual contributor roles, but not manager roles since she didn’t have managerial experience.
In one of those interviews, she really liked the hiring manager and the company, but didn’t like the analyst position she was offered. Her frustration gave her the courage to tell the hiring manager during the interview that she was not looking for an analyst role. She said she would only take a job that had managerial responsibilities. And she walked away.
After a few months, she got a call from the hiring manager with an offer for a manager position. She happily accepted it, and it was the best job she ever had! (By the way, that is my story.)
Asserting yourself at work with your superiors, employees, clients, suppliers, and coworkers will help you get ahead in your career. It can open up new opportunities, get you noticed, heard, appreciated, recognized, and even promoted.
Sign up for our Weekly Newsletter for speaking up assertively tips and inspiration to boost your career!
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“If you don’t have a seat at the table, you’re probably on the menu.” – Elizabeth Warren