The secret to powerful compliments is to be specific. You can show the positive impact of their actions on yourself and others, a measurable performance, an aspect of their personality, a positive behavior, or a useful process used.
By Assertive Way
Key Takeaways
- Compliments have the power to connect, build trust, motivate, change behaviors, and teach.
- “Great job” and “well done” are vague, express judgement, and are depersonalized.
- “Great job” and “well done” also have major limitations in reach: some people don’t believe or accept that type of compliment, it is not appropriate with higher authority, and it limits the number of compliments you can give.
- The better alternative is to give specific compliments around impact, performance, personality, behavior, or process.
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5 Better Ways To Say “Great Job”
For a powerful compliment, show the positive impact of what they did on yourself and others, measurable performance, an aspect of their personality, a positive behavior, or a useful process used.
Are most of your compliments a “great job” or “well done?”
Those are shortcut compliments, the least effective form of positive feedback. They are vague and don’t provide any insight as to what you liked and why you liked it. They are also ineffective to change behavior because the compliment receivers will not know what behavior led to the compliment.
Limitation 1 – Did you know that many people don’t believe or agree with the compliments they receive? If they don’t believe in your compliment, they will distrust you more instead of feeling more connected and motivated.
I had a mentor who said I did a good job on my first speech. When I asked for specific details, he had nothing specific to share. That made me feel very frustrated. One of my line managers told everyone in his team “good job” all the time, so when he said it to me, I didn’t take him seriously. That is why I’ve avoided using “good job” or “well done” when expressing positive feedback to my team.
Limitation 2 – The second limitation of “good job” is that it doesn’t work when complimenting more senior people like your boss or mentor. “Good job” and “well done” inherently imply that you are judging the other person’s actions.
Limitation 3 – The third limitation of “good job” is that it limits your ability to share positive feedback, which is important for nurturing positive relationships. It has a very narrow scope and is usually used for people who excelled or won something, which means it excludes most people from getting a compliment.
Here are 5 better ways to say “good job” or “well done” that work for anyone. These compliments are more thoughtful, effective, and impactful. You can also include more than one in a single compliment for even more impact.
“Great job” and “well done” are shortcut compliments, the least effective form of positive feedback. They are vague and don’t provide any insight as to what you liked and why you liked it.
Impact Compliment
One of the most powerful ways to express positive feedback is to acknowledge the positive impact of the other person on your life and on others, because it taps in to their sense of purpose.
According to positive psychology, purpose and meaning are the ultimate source of happiness and personal fulfillment.
If you are a manager, this is also a fantastic opportunity to reinforce the vision for the department or company.
Here are some examples of impact compliments:
- “Your leadership in this project allowed me to focus on recruitment which I really needed to do. Thanks for that.”
- “Your research on this procedure will save many lives!”
Performance Compliment
If someone performed well with measurable outputs, the performance-based compliment is great way to acknowledge it. Share the actual result or how the person compares to others.
Here are some examples of performance compliments:
- “Well done for exceeding your sales targets this month.”
- “You are the only person to hit the cost savings for the year.”
Personality Compliments
When you appreciate an aspect of someone’s personality, you can highlight it in a compliment and explain why you like it. This is also a powerful compliment if the compliment receiver also likes that aspect of their own personality.
In the personality compliment you could mention values, character, and principles.
Here are some examples of personality compliments:
- “You are very strategic in your thinking about problems.”
- “Your feedback is always very specific and helpful.”
Behavior Compliments
If your goal is to reinforce positive behavior, you can compliment someone’s behavior. This includes attitude, effort, improvement, and ethics.
Here are some examples of behavioral compliments:
- “I loved how you supported your teammates throughout the project.”
- “I appreciate all the extra hours you put into this.”
Process Compliments
You can also compliment the process someone used, the way they went about solving a problem or doing their job.
Here are some examples of process compliments:
- “You were very diligent in keeping track of our meetings and decisions.”
- “Thanks for inspiring the team with interesting articles you find.”
One of the most powerful ways to express positive feedback is to acknowledge the positive impact of the other person on your life and on others, because it taps in to their sense of purpose.
I didn’t include compliments on looks, attire, or possessions because those are the weakest form of compliment. However, they can still be effective when you don’t know much about someone or in personal relationships.
And remember compliments go hand in hand with appreciation and gratitude. To further strengthen your positive feedback, you can add a “thank you” or “I appreciate that” at the end of it.
Compliments are a powerful tool for positive and meaningful relationships, if used in the right way. Spend the extra few minutes to think of a thoughtful compliment on impact, performance, personality, behavior, or process.
To learn more about the difference between praise and positive feedback, visit this blog post here.
Compliments are not the only way to show you care about others. If you want to be a better leader, here are 15 ways of showing your care about your team members.
When you share positivity through compliments with others, you also feel happier and more joyful. Here are 24 practical ways to create more joy at work.
Sign up for our Weekly Newsletter “Nice With Limits” for tips and inspiration for confidence at work and to boost your career!
We take your email seriously and will never sell or share it.
Summary
Here are 5 better ways to say “good job” or “well done” that work with anyone.
- Impact compliment
- Performance compliment
- Personality compliment
- Behavior compliment
- Process compliment
“A sincere compliment is one of the most effective tools to teach and motivate others.” – Zig Ziglar
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