You don’t have to breathe deeply, meditate, or exercise. Just speak up more.
By Assertive Way
In these times of uncertainty, you don’t want to add unnecessary stress to your life. You already know stress is bad for you. It worsens your health, productivity, and relationships.
In this article you will learn 3 ways to reduce your stress without having to breathe deeply, meditate, or exercise.
A lot of your stress comes from poor and inauthentic communication in your relationships. Much of the stress comes from how we react to something that happens to us. Reacting assertively to relationship issues is a fantastic way to reduce your stress.
Reacting assertively to relationship issues are a fantastic way to reduce your stress.
“You can’t always control what goes on outside, but you can always control what goes on inside.” – Wayne Dyer
Here are 3 ways to relieve your stress using assertiveness.
CREATE CLARITY
- Problem
- Are you confused about why nice people are spreading negative gossip about you, why your boss won’t give you the recognition you deserve, or why your boss blocked you from getting a promotion in another department?
- Lack of clarity can be stressful. For example, not understanding why others act passive-aggressively with you or not knowing what to expect from them.
- Do not try to guess what others think, know, or want. Your guess is likely to be wrong because you do not have the full picture of what is going on in the life of the other person and you do not know their beliefs.
- Similarly, do not expect them to accurately guess what is happening in your mind, with your feelings, and your goals.
- Solution
- Ask questions to understand how others think, feel, behave, and what they want.
- Say what you want, think, and feel.
- Address baby issues before they grow. Don’t ignore a little misunderstanding. Small issues will repeat over and over again if not clarified.
STOP FEELING GUILTY FOR NO REASON
- Problem
- Guilty feelings causes rumination, sleepless nights, and inaction.
- The problem arises when the guilty feeling is not right because you attribute too much of what happens to others to something you did or said.
- Guilt when you do something that is clearly wrong has a purpose in our lives. But if you constantly feel guilty every time someone else is unhappy, then that guilt is just stealing your energy.
- Solution
- Understand that you are not responsible for other people’s feelings. Their feelings come from how they interpret facts based on their beliefs and past experiences. It’s not always about you.
- Look for evidence that you really did something wrong. Chances are you didn’t do anything wrong.
- Ask others for feedback. If they look upset at you, ask them if you did something to upset them.
SAY ‘NO’ MORE OFTEN
- Problem
- When you say ‘yes’ to one thing, you automatically say ‘no’ to something else that may be more important to you. It is important to intentionally spend your energy, resources, and time on your own priorities.
- Saying ‘yes’ when you do not mean it creates overwhelm, stress, and burnout.
- It also reduces how fast you progress on your own goals.
- Solution
- Start by saying ‘no’ or ‘not now’ instead of ‘yes’ every time someone asks you to do something that is not a requirement. You can always change your ‘no’ to a ‘yes’ later if needed, after you’ve taken some time to evaluate your priorities.
- Do not over justify, because it will create more confusion and make you look apologetic.
- Say ‘no’ firmly, without hesitation, but politely.
- If you want more details on when to say no, click here.
Start by saying ‘no’ or ‘not now’ instead of ‘yes’ every time someone asks you to do something that is not a requirement.
I challenge you to have confident, candid, and caring conversations today to reduce all unnecessary stress in your life. Find your assertive way to happiness, impact, and to release the best version of yourself.
Want to learn more about how to be assertive and polite at the same time?
SUMMARY
To relieve your stress, focus on how you react to a relationship miscommunication. Be authentic and assertive by creating clarity, stop feeling guilty, and saying ‘no’ when you want to say ‘no.’
“You can’t always control what goes on outside, but you can always control what goes on inside.” – Wayne Dyer